Changing of an behavior

Its been a week since I have last written and things have still been up in the air. I am living at such a low capacity for me and I am growing more and more anxious everyday. Richard says things will change soon and life will be more stable but its  hard to believe him. He and I still struggle today ,we got into a fight because once again he made a remark that seemed offensive to me, but he swears he meant nothing by it. That is a problem though because I have gotten so defensive towards him that anything that might seem like a remark or joke at my expense hurts me. He has promised to change over and over  the last two years but the change that I need has not come quickly enough for me and I have told him it's time for him to do something differently. So we agreed that he would journal everyday, he is going to write down every time I hear him make an offensive joke or comment about me and I will let him know why exactly it hurt my feelings, he is also going to write down days when he has been kind to me. He will write in it everyday if he is serious. My part of this will be not engaging in the often hurtful banter and to not even start it. I am afraid of how this will change things because for so long we have been this way, making fun of each other and laughing  until someone goes too far. I just need to remember that the rest of our lives are meant to be different. I do believe that if we can change and grow together nothing will stop our love from lasting a very long time, but I am getting tired of waiting for the change, I guess this where I am to practice some patience and being positive.